Top 5 Relationship Killers that You Must Avoid

Relationships are made and broken all around us. At such times, we become apprehensive about our own relationships. We try to protect what we cherish the most. We try to look at ways and means how we can keep our relationship flame burning. However, at the same time, we don’t realize that there are things we may do that can destroy a beautiful relationship. Actually speaking, it is these things—which are mostly behavioral traits—that we need to avoid.

 

Possessiveness

 

It is good to be a little possessive about your partner, but if you are too much possessive, then it can only backfire. You shouldn’t, for example, hog all of their free time. You shouldn’t be jealous of the other people they move around with. Give them their life to live; if you are confident about them, you will always remain the most important person in their life.

 

Restrictions

 

Too often, in a relationship, we tend to make people act in the way we want them to act. We tell them to avoid doing certain things they like and do certain things they detest. This is restrictive behavior. If you put yourself in their place, you will find that this kind of behavior can be stifling. A time may come when your partner eventually snaps and walks out.

 

Asking for Change

 

You need to realize that your partner is a different person. They have been brought up in a different way from you and they have a personality that is different from yours. You shouldn’t want them to become like you; it is best if they remain the person they were when you first decided to have a relationship with them. Even if your partner is willing to change, it will be unacceptable to them as well as you.

 

Complacency

 

When you are in a relationship, you have certain obligations. You need to do a few special things keeping your partner in mind. It is not just about remembering their birthday and showering them with gifts, but you also have to give them a good ear when they want it, a shoulder to cry on when they are looking for one and a motivational word when they need it. You cannot let your relationship grow all by itself; it won’t.

 

Competition

 

Even within the staunchest of relationships, there is always an element of skepticism. You shouldn’t do anything to aggravate that feeling. For example, it is best not to be too friendly to other people if your partner is feeling threatened by them. Casual banter is all right, but you need to draw the line with your other people when you are in a relationship with someone.

 

 

 

3 Tips on How To Get Your Ex Back

Today, I’m going to provide you with three tips on how to get your ex back. A lot of people trying to find ways to get that person back they feel they lost and let slip out of their hands, and they want to reconcile things. I want to give you what you looking for. I want to help you in achieving that goal of getting your ex back. Here are three important tips if you want to make this happen. 

Tip number one.

Correct the issue that led to the breakup in the first place. Listen, there’s no factor in attempting to obtain your ex back if the same concern that broke you 2 up exists. Whether that exists within you, within them, in the dynamic of the relationship. One-way or another, you have to correct and resolve that. Because even if you successfully get them back without fixing those things. You’re most likely to be headed for an additional break up. There’s no point if you can’t get to the root of the issues and correct them so take time. 

Again, if it’s an issue within yourself let’s say, for example, you have insecurity issues due to past relationships. We’ll listen, start to get some healing. Go see a counselor, go see a coach. See someone so that you can sit down and unpack these things and work through them so that when you come back, you can come back more confident, more secure within yourself. Therefore you can increase your chances of getting that person back. 

Tip number two 

Now, that makes catch you by surprise but let me help you understand what I’m saying. I see so many people wallowing in misery, trying to get their ex back. Essentially trying to pity party their ex into taking them back. Trying to use sympathy and I can’t live without you and all these things. Listen, to a certain extent, there’s nothing wrong with expressing your emotions and expressing your deep love for them, but it makes you look weak, to be honest with you. It looks bad. Who wants to be around that negativity

or that misery that you’re exuding? Granted it’s stemming from the fact that you don’t have them so you may think that makes them feel better or that would warm their hearts so to speak to you. To some degree, it can, however, when you exude positivity, confidence, happiness, it draws them to you, and makes them say, “Damn, maybe I need to have them back in my life.”

“Maybe I missed out.”You have to give them something to desire and so finding your happiness will create or will increase your chances of them wanting to be back with you or willing to be back with you. Don’t stay focused on what you don’t have. Don’t stay focused on the fact that they’re not with you right now. Obtain focused on what you can do to enhance your life. 

The side effect of this is that if by some chance you don’t get them back–I know your goal is to get them back, but if you don’t get them back. Well, at least you would have used your time wisely and set yourself up for great things to come. Whether that be continuing as a single person or when a new relationship presents itself, so work on you, find your happiness. Now, before we get to 

Tip number three

I got to say something and you’re not going to like this. Here is the reality. You may not need to get back with your ex. The reality is that you’ve got to be honest with yourself about

was this person truly the best person for you? Was there an authentic connection? Before you go diving into trying to find all the ways to get them back make sure you need to get back with them.

You should be with them and they are someone you can move forward within life and create a great, happy relationship. Again, I know that’s not what you want to hear. But it’s my job to tell you the truth that you need to hear,

and some of you don’t need to get that ex back. But let’s say they are that person for you. You can have a happy relationship with them and there is a connection.

Here is tip number three. You’ve got to be patient. Listen, Rome wasn’t constructed in a day. I don’t know why that came to me just now, but the fact of the matter is you’ve got to be willing to trust the process

and the timing of things. You can’t force your ex to want you or to be with you when you’re ready. You got to understand that they’ve got to go through some things as well

and it may take time. Again, refer back to number two on this list. Find your happiness in the meantime. Work on you in the meantime but be patient and yes, it can happen

 

***Read also >>> I want my ex back

Why do you believe men constantly return?

What do you think about the answer I’m about to give you in a second? Now, I hear it all the time, you know, women dealing with men that really don’t belong in their lives, okay. And the man not really trying to let go. And I even have a chapter in my book, “He’s Lying Sis” that says, he won’t let you go, but that doesn’t mean he loves you. So, one, let’s get something straight. The fact that he keeps coming back, do not assume that’s love. In most cases, it ain’t got nothing to do with love, it’s infatuation.

And there are some other reasons I’m going to explain in a second, but I see a lot of times, sometimes women getting caught up or taking men back because they think well, he must love me because he keeps trying so hard. He must love me because every time I let him go, he finds his way back to me, this must be real feelings. No, not at all, it can be attached, it can be infatuation, it can be a convenience, all right. But do not assume that just because he’s not letting you go, that, that means he loves you.

One of the big reasons why he keeps coming back is because he can. Because he knows, you’re going to give in and let him in that door. He knows if he says the right things if he acts right for a week or two or whatever the case may be, it’s going to get you weak enough. And I, and I don’t use the word weak to insult you, but it puts you in a moment of weakness to where you let your guard back down unnecessarily with him and you allow him back into your life. And so, you, you got to be mindful of not falling for the tricks because regardless of why he keeps coming back, the question you have to ask yourself is why do you keep letting him back in? Why do you keep allowing this man to have access to you, if you know he is not for you? It is up to you to shut that door. It is up to you to say no. 

It is up to you to start recognizing his tactics and not allowing yourself to fall for it. Now, let me say this. It does not mean there’s never been a scenario where a man has come back because he genuinely loves the woman. That can happen that does happen. Some men do struggle to let go because there are real feelings there. But again, as a woman, you’ve got to be asking yourself, like, don’t evaluate his actions for a second. Take a step back and say, do you really believe he’s the man for you? Because regardless of whatever his intentions are, whether he genuinely feels like he loves you, whether it is just because you’re convenient, whatever it is, none of it matters, because what matters most is, how do you feel? How do you see this man?

If you’ve already recognized he’s not for you, then to hell with his supposed feelings, you understand what I’m saying? And if you know he’s not the one for you, then yes, chances are he is not acting out of love. He is acting out of the things we mentioned about infatuation, attachment, and so on and so forth. So, many times yes, men will walk away or you’ll let them go and they can start missing you because the reality is that you provided a certain benefit. And they want that benefit again back in their life. And it’s very normal for people to gravitate back to that thing that they were comfortable with. 

That was reliable in their life because they’re not getting it elsewhere right now. So, one of the reasons, another reason why he might be coming back is that he didn’t find another option. And, and that’s damn sure not a reason for you to entertain him, but it is to explain why he continues to show back up. But again, I don’t want you to assume all situation of a man coming back is a man you should not entertain. But I damn sure don’t want you thinking that you should always entertain him.

I want you to be able to take a step back in these situations and really be honest with yourself or more importantly, pray about it. Now, I know you don’t hear that from everybody, but the reality is that we don’t pray and talk to God enough about the people that we’re dealing with or if we should be dealing with somebody. And so, if that man pops back in your life, take a step back and pray, listen to your intuition, listen to your spirit, and allow that to guide you into whether you should be entertaining this or not, whether you should allow yourself to take that phone call. Because sometimes, not only do you need to recognize if he’s not for you or not, but if he’s not, you need to find ways to not allow any crack of the door, all right. 

So, that might require you erasing messages, deleting phone numbers, removing pictures, removing yourself from social media or from being friends with him on social media, if that’s what it takes to make sure you don’t keep falling into this cycle of continuously taking this man back, then so be it, that’s what needs to happen. But again, stop focusing so much on why he keeps coming back? Ask yourself, why do you keep taking him back? Ask yourself, should you be entertaining him? And if you know you shouldn’t, close that door, keep it shut, and move forward.